Why Don’t We Dress Up Anymore?
I love dressing up!Β Β I like to put time into my appearance and feel presentable when I go out of the house, but sadly most people today don’t agree with me.Β Β In fact, I finally stopped asking about dress codes last year because I was tired of being told, “Oh, you know, just wear whatever.”Β Well, my goodness – “whatever” sounds like a simply lovely thing to wear to that party!Β Β Or what about the time I was going to an important business meeting a while back and was instructed that I should wear (and I quote) “jeans and a top” to the owner of the company? Β Whatever happened to trying to make a good impression?Β Whatever happened to showing people you care enough about them to dress up, or that you at least have enough respect for yourself to put on something that shows you care about your job, your position, or whatever it is you’re doing?Β The pervading attitude seems to be, “Why should I get out of my sweatpants to go to a function when they are so comfortable?”Β Is comfort really the number one priority when it comes to our lives?Β Are we all a bunch of grown-up little kids who need our clothing to feel like soft and cuddly teddy bears in order to not have an “uncomfortable” day?
Besides “comfy” clothes, another common theme is brand-new “threadbare” clothes…Β It never ceases to astonish me that people pay good money for pants that have holes in them, or unhemmed shirts that are already unraveling where the hems were supposed to be.Β The sad thing is that frumpiness is so common in our culture that we don’t think there’s anything wrong with it.Β It has become a common occurrence to see a 40-something year old lady grocery shopping in her gym clothes, a mother of toddlers dashing about town in leggings and her husband’s t-shirt, and teenage girls walking down the street in such small amounts of fabric I’m not sure they quite get the point of clothing…
All kidding aside though, I feel sad when I see people who live their whole lives in such a hurry that they never take time to really dress up.Β One does not need a grand occasion to put on a neatly pressed outfit and some lipstick before you leave the house.Β Simply waking up is a good enough reason to be in a happy mood every morning and let your attire reflect that mood by putting some effort into your appearance!
Merely being a lady is a good enough excuse to spend 15 minutes doing your makeup and a few minutes choosing a flattering outfit for the day. Life is precious, and you deserve the time it takes to feel beautiful every day!
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In days gone by, ladies spent a large amount of time in the morning at their dressing tables, whether it was the in beruffled days of Victorian times, or in the more glamorous decade of the 1950s.Β The early morning routine was a time to get ready for the day ahead…
I know that many people dress up only for rare occasions, but here are several thoughts I’ve had over the last few years:
(The dress shown above is what I’m wearing today as I write this post.)
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When you look nice, you will FEEL nice!
- If you think your appearance looks bad, you are more likely to feel terrible.Β It’s hard to think positive, happy thoughts when you look in the mirror and see something you don’t like.
- Dressing up makes people happy when they see you.Β I couldn’t possibly count all the times that a lady at the grocery store or someone at the post office has smiled and said, “Oh!Β I love your dress!”Β (Or lipstick, etc.)
- When you dress up, you are automatically treated with more respect.Β Wearing something professional, classy, or fashionable makes people think more highly of you than if you came to the store in, say, your pajama pants for instance.Β If you *look* like an important person, people will usually treat you like an important person.
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Wearing Classy Clothing
As a little girl, I remember sitting on the living floor in my grandparent’s house and playing with toys while family members sat on the couch going through old photos.Β Aside from the general remarks about, “Oh, how she’s grown” that you might expect, the majority of the comments were sprinkled with giggles and moans and remarks such as, “Oh, that DRESS!Β It’s hideous!”Β “I can’t believe we used to wear shorts like those.”Β “Can you believe that they thought that was pretty?”
And then someone randomly made a comment that has stuck with me for the rest of my life.Β She said, “Someday people will look back at the pictures of what we’re wearing today and probably think the same thing.“
And you know what?Β She was right!Β In the early 90s women’s wardrobes consisted of those dreadful stirrup leggings, oversized t-shirts, neon colors, frumpy flat loafer shoes with tassels, and lots and lots of jumpers…
~ Elegance is Always in Style ~
Β But no matter how hideous an outfit was at any time in history, you can be pretty sure that the long haired hippie or the bobbed haired flapper who wore it thought she was awfully cool at the time when she wore it.Β So here’s my point – we must choose clothes that are BEAUTIFUL, and not just trendy!Β There HAVE been decades of clothing when no one could ever look back and say “That was ugly”, because nearly all of the clothing from that era was designed with class, taste, and elegance!Β No one could possibly say that Grace Kelly’s wedding dress was out-of-date, that Lily Elsie’s lace gowns were unbecoming, that Queen Victoria’s ball gowns were unflattering, or that Lucille Ball’s 1950s day dresses were ugly.Β Because you know what?Β All of these ladies’ outfits were designed in such gorgeous styles and fabrics, with such classiness and elegance in the cut and fit, that at no point in history could they ever be considered unattractive or overdone.Β It *IS* entirely possible to choose such lovely and timeless clothing for today that even in twenty years from now people won’t shudder and say, “That was SO 20-teens!” just like we say, “That was SO 1980s!” about perms and oversized pouffy sleeves nowadays.
So what styles can we choose to wear today that will always be as classy and beautiful as possible?Β Β My motto is:Β “Elegance is always in style!” Β Here areΒ some observations I’ve made:
- As a general rule, romantic and feminine styles will always be beautiful, no matter the decade.Β Stick with trulyΒ beautiful and flattering styles whenever possible!
- Lace –Β LaceΒ blouses, skirts and dresses are almost always beautiful.Β Yes, Gunne Sax dresses can still be dated to the 70s, but most of them are still gorgeous even if they aren’t the latest fashion.Β Β Lace is probably one of the most elegant fabrics of all time, so you really can’t go wrong with lace, as long as it’s not in a bizarre color. π
- Ruffles – I have yet to see a ruffled blouse from any era that I didn’t absolutely adore!Β Many modern takes on the Edwardian shirtwaist (think Anne of Avonlea), have resulted in gorgeous, ladylike versions of office-attire blouses.Β Ruffles at the neck, down the center, and at the wrists are just dazzling, and when I look at all the ruffled blouse patterns from the last 40 years they are almost all stillΒ classy and gorgeous.
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- Defined, natural waistlines – When in doubt, always choose a natural waistline over a dropped waist dress!Β The “hourglass” silhouette is SO much more becoming than “tent” shaped silhouette.Β Β The most beautiful decades ofΒ fashion history all had the same thing in common – the cinched waistline.Β Empire waistlines *can* be pretty when done right, but they oftentimes tend to suggest pregnancyΒ so they areΒ usually best avoided unless you’re wearing a Regency costume.
- Classy colors – Neutrals like White, cream, ivory, browns, greys, navy and black usually stand the test of time.Β Golds, peach, light pink, bright red, sapphire blue, periwinkle, aqua/mint, silver, forest green, lavender, and royal purple are colors that still look elegant decades later.Β However, some of the more abstract or “avant garde” colors will only be “in” for certain seasons and then will be “out” again in a hurry.Β These typically include neon colors such as lime green, orange, very bright yellows, or any unusual combination of colors.
- Dainty prints – Polka dots and small to medium floral prints have almost always been in fashion.Β Large oversized prints, geometric designs, or anything too out of the usual tends to go out of style quickly – and stay out of style permanently!Β Honestly, I have been shocked at the outfits that many girls I follow on Pinterest have pinned (even girls who are into vintage clothing!), and that they usually add these pins to “Beautiful Clothing” boards.Β Not to be unkind to anyone, but a mustard colored sweater over a red and aqua chevron striped dress is not pretty today, nor will it ever be pretty in the future.Β We must make sure that we are choosing clothes that are truly lovely and tasteful, and not just because everyone else is wearing it.
- Tasteful, modest styles – I believe that dresses look prettier when skirts are not above the knees, (as did Edith Head), and when necklines are high enough to not show off so much skin.Β Β Think of the elegant dresses worn by Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, and Lucille Ball – many of these dresses were conservatively cut but looked fabulous, because they were tailored to fit, and made of high quality fabrics.
- Boleros –Β They are so effortlessly elegant and flattering.Β You can wear a simple knit one over any a casual dress, or a lace bolero over an evening gown.Β The shorter cut of boleros makes them so much more becoming on most women than longer jackets.
- Circle skirts – While these originated in the 50s, many high end designers today use this silhouette in refined solid fabrics like wools, silks, or suedes.Β Toss on a sweater, add a sparkly pin, grab ballet flats and a purse, and you’re likely to be the best-dressed lady in town.Β When made in a ponte knit or denim, circle skirts are a highly fashionable alternative to yoga pants or jeans for busy mommies.Β They can pair with most any casual top you own, and make you feel dressed up on hectic days, without taking any more time than pulling on shorts.
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- Pearls!Β – Small or large, white or ivory, single or double strand, I doubt whether any decade passed without pearlΒ necklaces and earringsΒ making their mark.Β Pearls are really the ultimate go-to accessory to keep on hand.
- Nylons/Tights! – I’m not as good at wearing tights as often as I should, but if you’re wearing a dress that isn’t super long it will look SO much classier and more polished if you wear tights.Β Nylons are for your feet and legs what foundation and powder is for your face.
Β So now that I’ve elaborated on what exactly I mean when I say “dressing up”, I’d love to hear from anyone else who does this, too!Β Please leave me your thoughts in the comments.Β I’m reminded of that song that Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra sang that goes, “You can pass any mirror and smile…”
Till next time!
Katrina
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Thank you so much for this post! Something all women need to hear again and again! (Sloppy clothes is one of my pet peeves, too!=) You always so cute and classy in all your outfits! =)
Thank you! It’s funny you posted this because I have a similar blog post in the works right now. (Actually, my whole blog’s kind of “in the works”, so I’m not linking to it currently:) )
I guess I hit the post button accidentally on the previous comment. I also wanted to say that I follow your Pinterest board you mentioned, and have gotten so much inspiration from your pins, so thanks a bunch! Your blog is always SUCH a joy to look at π
I agree with you on so many things! But even so, I felt a little bit defensive on some of your points. I always try to look my best, but by golly, not everyone has the talent for it that you have. I appreciate that what you are emphasizing is to be mindful of your appearance and make a bit of an effort. I wonder if you realize the lack of time many ladies have for good grooming and dressing compared to their counterparts had decades ago. And I can attest that most young ladies today have not had the training your mother has undoubtedly given you. My mother is from a fairly Puritanical background and was never able to embrace makeup, frills, lace, etc. (I’ve been working to soften her up for decades, with some successes.) I grew up wearing thrifty handmedowns from my brother, hair trimmed short (the dreaded “Pixie” from the 1960’s). I was not allowed to wear nylons until I was 15 (mother was shocked when I shaved my legs, and poor Dad, I used his razor as I was afraid to touch hers!), mascara and lip gloss when I was 16. Heels were always frowned upon, and now I can’t wear them anyway due to a painful arthritic joint in my foot. Please understand that not everyone has the luxury of taste, background and resources that you do. That being said, I am glad that you have the spunk to speak up for the mindset of putting in some effort, and not to judge the results over the intent. Also, I wish I could hire you as my personal stylist! I hope you keep saying what you think, and welcome this kind of discussion. I find it interesting and refreshing.
Hi, Ladies!
Susi, I’m glad you liked it! Thank you. π
Kate, your blog post sounds neat! I would love to read it when you are finished.
Wendy, thank you! Yes, I know firsthand that ladies don’t have the time they used to – I work *full* time, run a business and blog, and try to volunteer as well. So I’m doing well just to get sleep at night! LOL. π But nevertheless, it doesn’t need to take a long time to look presentable during the day – even just 10 minutes of makeup can be all one needs to toss on some lipstick and mascara really quickly. (And unless a woman was extemely wealthy and had lots of servants back in the “olden days”, they probably had as much to do as we do between raising kids and running a house and sewing their own clothing, etc.) The emphasis for me is not so much that everyone fits into a cookie cutter mold of “vintageness” when it comes to attire, but just that they are doing *their* personal best. π As far as high heels go – yes! My mom has a serious foot condition as well and therefore has only been able to wear flats for years. (Hence the suggestion about “tossing on high heels or flats” in the article.) Most of my outfits, by the way, are not expensive or elaborate things at all, as I usually sew them myself and almost always make my dresses for $15 or $20 or less. I do realize that some people have been taught that putting effort into one’s appearance might suggest vanity (such as those who think that makeup is wrong, etc.), but as long as makeup isn’t overdone or gaudily applied it is usually a good thing. π
Sarah, yay! It’s always good to hear from hat lovers! Thanks for the comment.
Thanks for this post! I love dressing up as well. I am always the dressiest person where ever I go. I hate that no one dresses up for ANYTHING anymore!!! And Hats I am so into hats now and am keeping a lookout for some really cool ones.
I was so inspired by reading this blog post! A lot of times girls (including myself!) get so caught up in what’s trendy or cute by the world’s standards. You’ve encouraged me to dress classy and beautiful! Thank you so much!
So true Katrina! I live on a college campus and am amazed at the lack of effort the ladies put into their appearance. I realize that looking nice is not a priority to them, but I find it amusing when I’m asked why I always dress up. These girls usually then go into a defensive rant about how they would dress up if it was comfortable. My question is always “how is a simple dress less comfortable than running shorts and a t-shirt?” Personally I’m more comfy if I look my best!
-Lauren
musingsofaflowerchild.com
I’m 63 years old.
Last week whilst wearing a simple (cotton knit) shift dress, and sandals, my (grey) hair caught up in a pony tail with a bow, at the grocery store, I several times caught a young woman with 2 little girls looking directly at me.
I recognized her (I’d worked for her father, more than 15 years ago), but she couldn’t place me. In the check out line, I called her by her name, and reminded her why she seemed to recognize me.
She told me that her older daughter had seen me when I came in, and told her that I MUST be a very NICE old lady, because I had a bow in my hair.
Hey love this blog post! My Mom is always telling me why don’t people dress up anymore! I think a majority of women are depressed, as they feel whats the point since no one cares or that my husband doesn’t pay attention to me anyway. Yet I think that’s beyond the point, because we should really dress up for self respect for ourselves and to point to God through what we wear and how we act in it. Amy Simpleton Mcpherson from the 1920’s-1930’s knew how to dress very classy and beautiful! Believing you can be modest yet beautiful!
Also don’t be surprised if you get sneered at as some women may be jealous cause you look so beautiful. However take heart because the important thing is being you and not some one else. Katherine thumbs up on the post!
I love this. I attend college and a lot of people are frumpy, but then most people are where I live. My family doesn’t understand much; my mom thinks I am wasting my time, but I don’t think we should be sloppy, and I certainly feel terrible when I don’t get dressed nicely.
I nominated this post for <a href="Title“>Miss Dashwood’s I’d Like to Share May edition.
Sorry I don’t think the link worked. Oh, well here it is plain:http://miss-dashwood.blogspot.com/
Excellent post! I used to wear t-shirts and pants with my hair in a pony tail every day all day when I was a little girl; something I do regret now that I’m older. I do agree; people respect you more when you dress up and/ or put effort into looking nice! : )
You are SO right!! I am finally figuring out that I feel (and look, obviously), a thousand times better when I wear nice, very ladylike clothing – even just grocery shopping! I always wear modest clothing anyway, but a tshirt and blah skirt with flip-flops just doesn’t get it. People respect and appreciate you when you dress nicely and like a lady! I love your blog! π
I made a Butterick 4790 dress recently- http://www.dollycreates.blogspot.com/2014/03/vintage-wardrobe-challenge-finished.html
THANK YOU! I totally agree. I actually wear skirts all the time for two major reasons–they are so much more elegant than pants on a lady and so much more comfortable than jeans, esp. skinny jeans! Also love lace, big gorgeous hats, and cute feminine shoes. I always get compliments on my outfits from random strangers, too π
Love your blog…this is the first time I’ve commented. Just had to say that I am so with you on this! π
This is the exact feeling I have as well today the ‘fashion’ today. I don’t see how people can pay $60 for a pair of jean shorts that are already ‘ready’ for the garbage! The style of dresses back in the late 30s through 50s were the epitome of women’s fashion. Thankfully, my brothers and sisters agree. My mother was raised in the 70-80s and so the 30-50s seems rather old-fashioned, but like Katrina said, have you ever went to town wearing a 50s styled dress? The comments would amaze you!
Katrina, I thank you for your bold statement on just how immodest these ‘girls’ of today are. I can’t wait till I have my little girls and I can sew them ALL of Shirley Temple’s dresses!! Even my brothers agree that a little girl is ‘cuter’ in a dress with ruffles and lace than jeans too tight and a shirt 2 sizes down.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!
Katrina, I thank you for your bold statement on just how immodest these ‘girls’ of today are. I can’t wait till I have my little girls and I can sew them ALL of Shirley Temple’s dresses!! Even my brothers agree that a little girl is ‘cuter’ in a dress with ruffles and lace than jeans too tight and a shirt 2 sizes down.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!
There is a quote that goes “Being well dressed is a beautiful form of politeness.” And I could not agree more! When you take a little time to look your best, you not only feel more confident, but it also tells the world that you have enough respect for yourself and for others to make an effort. I wonder how many women would be surprised at how easy and comfortable it is to wear a dress instead of t-shirts and jeans and how much better they might feel about their self-image too!
Lovely post, Katrina!
I love this post and you have officially inspired my latest blog post! It felt so nice to dress up today even though I didn’t have anywhere to go.
Wow, I love all your thoughts, Ladies! Thank you so much for leaving these comments! It is so encouraging to hear from people who are the same page when it comes to dressing up! Really made my day. π
Happy sewing, and thank you to each one of you!
Katrina
Hi Katrina,
Thanks for this post.
I often get asked by people who like to dress casual & comfortable how I look so good. They don’t understand that I am most comfortable looking good. I’m sure we all have stories where we ‘just ran in to the grocery’ & were embarrassed because we met someone there.
As far as timeless style, there is no such thing. I remember people making fun of full skirts & lace. You just dress in what you feel is modest and pretty and you’ll be OK.
BTW, I love your style, you always look so pretty.
i so agree with this post..i am so tired of looking at frumpy, grungy people…it is almost like a contest of who can look the worst!! even individuals applying for jobs look like they just rolled out of bed and put on the first thing that caught their eye…ewwww…i always try to look my best when i leave the house, even if i go to the hardware store..it helps to get questions answered and people don’t treat me as the “little” lady doing a guys job!! thanks for this post!!
I love this post! I always dress up, even if I’m just going to the grocery store. The fashion nowadays is mostly rags; and torn, holey jeans are ridiculously expensive. Most people just wear t-shirts and jeans, and so slobby. Dresses and skirts are much more comfortable than jeans. I love the 30s and 40s clothing styles. Now that was class at its finest, and people knew how to dress.
I’m so glad you liked it, Kaydee! Yes, it’s true that so many “ugly” fashions are still outrageously expensive nowadays. It is amazing to me that people spend money to look like that. LOL! π But I think that if enough of us keep dressing up, it just may turn out to be a trend! π
All the best,
Katrina
i couldn’t agree more! Love, love the polka dot circle skirt.
I love dressing up,even at my volunteer job at a youth center I am always wearing a skirt and nice top or a dress ,flats in the warm weather , thick tights and boots in cold weather , even at family functions I always dress up.Wearing pretty clothes makes one feel so special . Which is why it’s sad that people don’t bother making an effort . I only wear sweats if I am lounging around at home on winter and fall weekends and for my daily walks walks . Pajamas are for bed or hospital stays not the grocery store unless you are sick or it’s the middle of the night and you are just running in,but even sweatpants are better
Absolutely love this post!! I agree with everything you said. As Coco Chanel said, “Dress shabbily and they remember the dress. Dress impeccably and they remember the woman.”
Thankfully I go to a church where the women wear skirts and dresses and the men wear suits, honestly I used to dislike this idea when I was younger but now I embrace it with open arms. I always wish the styles of back then would come back, but I believe that individuals like you and likeminded ladies will influence many others to put more effort into how they present themselves.
Love from London,
Maryrose
Hi Katrina. I love what you said about dressing up more often and making an effort to look presentable and elegant. I for one do this on a daily basis, however, I am having difficulty in acquiring the appropriate dresses to wear. I have a rectangle body shape and most dresses that are being sold now have such a short hemline that the dress ends up becoming a mini dress on me, I am tall and thin, like a fashion model. I was informed that a shift dress would be appropriate for my body shape, well…I have to disagree, have you seen those dresses, if they even are called a dress? They look like a potato sack, Lol, how in the world can one look elegant in such a garment? Their is no definition of the waist at all, infact the garment hides your entire silloute, maybe I am being mislead but what are your suggestions on an appropriate dress for a rectangle body? Thank you.
Hi Susan!
First of all, I apologize that your comment was being held in my spam folder and I did not see it till today (2/28/19.) That is good that you are trying to find the right style to wear for your body type! And I agree with you – shapeless shift dresses are not flattering on someone who has a trim figure! π For a tall rectangle figure, I would recommend styles that give the illusion of an hourglass figure. For instance, you could wear a dress that has a cinched waist and a slightly wider skirt, or a dark pencil dress with a brightly colored belt to emphasize the waist. If you like ruffled or peasant style tops, go for it! Since a rectangle figure is a little more boxy, you don’t have to worry about overdoing the feminine styles. Look for things that add softness to your overall look, and don’t be afraid to experiment with different styles until you find what works for you!
All the best,
Katrina Holte
I really like how you enjoy dressing up! Itβs nice to hear someone talk about feeling good by looking nice every day. Your idea to wear classic styles and feel confident in what we wear is great. Let’s bring back the fun of dressing well for any occasion!
This post is such a fun and empowering reminder to embrace our style with confidence! Life really is too short for frumpy clothes, and I love how you encourage readers to dress in a way that makes them feel fabulous every day. Fashion should be joyful and expressive!
Janet, thank you for sharing! It also helps you be treated with more respect when you dress up and look your best every day. There are so many benefits to dressing well!
All the best,
Katrina
Everything you are saying is true. One has to consider their lifestyle, personality, and budget to do these things. One also has to develop a personal fashion style, and evolve it when needed, and that can be a lot of work for people.